Just in time for the holidays! I’ve created a whole bunch of new necklaces and you can find them on my website/e-store at circa1856.com. Great gifts guys!!

Just a quick departure from dementia mania to let everyone know that I’ve put out my very first e-newsletter, “The Circa 1856 Insider”.  Check it out by going to my website:  Circa1856.com and filling out the very short subscriber form at the bottom of the “about us” page.  Hopefully you’ll learn a bit about antique jewelry and you can also check out the latest sale items and the newest creations on the site. Thanks so much!

My dad has gone through two perfectly great pair of hearing aides–$6400 EACH!!!! and has gotten NO benefit from either because, HE WON’T WEAR THE FUCKING THINGS!!!!!!!

The first pair he got from an audiologist at Lake Forest Hospital (it took 4 appointments to get everything right). After all that, he refused to wear them because “people can see them. I want the ones that go in your ear and no one can see them.”  Of course when we initially went to get him tested, it was explained to him (about 28 times,) that his hearing loss was too great for those invisible ones to do him any good.  He said, “ok,” and I, like the complete beleaguered idiot that I have become, put the ol’ VISA down and spent $6400, thinking “problem solved and thank God it is because I can’t take this “WHAT?!????”  every three seconds, any more.”

Of course you can guess what happened next:  Cordie refused to wear them because:

Cordie:  “people can see them.  I want the ones that go in my ear that no one can see.  I won’t wear these god damn things.  I can hear just fine.”

Anne:  “No, you cannot hear just fine.”

Cordie:  “PARDON??!?!?!”

Sigh.

About a year later, I applied for VA benefits for Cordie, and got them.  The VA folk, btw, were tremendously nice, professional and thorough in every way.  Prescription co-pays went from $30 to $8!  The docs worked him up doing every test imaginable and then sent him to the audiology lab.

Cordie:  “Where are they taking me?

Anne:  “Dad, we’re going to the audiology department to get your hearing tested.”

Cordie: “WHAT?!?!”

So it was “Ground Hog Day” all over again in the audiology department.

Cordie:  “Hello  Doctor.  Nice to meet you.  Thank you so much for helping me.”

Gary, the audiologist:  “My pleasure sir.  We’re going to test your hearing to determine how much hearing loss you have and then we’ll fix you right up and get you some brand new hearing aids.”

Cordie: I don’t need hearing aids”

Anne:  “Oh yes you do Dad.  If you won’t do it for yourself, please do it for me.”

Cordie: “Ok.  But I don’t want the ones that stick out.  I want the ones that go in your ear and no one can see them.”

Gary, the Aud:  “Well sir, your hearing loss is too great for those invisible aids, but at least your hearing is still good enough so that you don’t have to wear the huge ear piece that fits over the whole ear.”

Cordie: “I appreciate that Dave, but I want the ones that go in your ear and no one can see them.”

Sigh.

After the fitting, Gary told us everything would be taken care of and to make an appointment in a week to come back to get the hearing aids.  I held my breath and asked how much these were going to cost.

Gary:  “Oh I’m so sorry.  I should of told you.  They’re free.”

Me:  “Oh    My   God!  Thank you VA!!!”

But, alls not well that never started well…

So tell me gentle readers, how do you think this story ends?

So my Dad has had full mouth dentures since I was really little.  They never fit well and he has always refused to get the dental work (like gum grafting) that would enable them to fit.  This has been going on for 40 years.  In the last three months, I’ve taken him to the dentist 3 times because of, well let’s just say “denture discomfort” and leave out the bloody details.  Each time, the dentist tells him that his teeth have to go to the lab to get adjusted and each time he’s refused to let me take his teeth to the lab.  Doesn’t want to give up his teeth for the day. Vanity, mainly. Has anyone else gone through this with their elderly parents?

So I finally got him to give me his teeth on Monday. When this is a major victory in one’s life, you gotta know it’s time to get another life. So, I drop the hapless teeth off at the lab and then later that day, I took my dad to the lab to retrieve the aforementioned dentures.  At this point, what could go wrong? Well, the teeth DIDN’T FIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  They were TOO SMALL!!!!!!!! He couldn’t keep them in his mouth!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Kill us both NOW!!!!!!!!!

Can you say, “Poligrip”?  Can you say, “Hello Dr. X, I need another dental appointment?!”  AHHHHHHHH

so did i mention that my father lost his dentures the FIRST FUCKING DAY HE WAS IN ASSISTED CARE!??!?!?  HOW DOES THIS HAPPEN?  I thought the whole point of assisted care was that they watch him and make sure nothing bad happens!

And then, there’s the car.  More phone calls from Dad: “Where’s my car?!?!?  I want you to bring it over here (to the nursing home) RIGHT NOW.  And bring the keys!”  “Where’e my GOD DAMN CAR?! “  Long discussion follows about how he isn’t supposed to drive etc. and finally, after about 7 phone calls over 3-4 days, he convinced me that he just needed to be able to see it parked outside of his window bec/ it gave him a sense of security etc.  I relented because I realize he has lost control of almost everything in his life, but I told him I wasn’t going to leave the keys.

So I drive it over to him and park it so he can see it outside the window.  He insists on having the keys, which, since we are in the nursing home and everyone can hear everything and I know he’ll start screaming, I give him the keys, with the plan to steal them back when he isn’t looking, which I do.  I take him down the hall to the window in front of the car.  The following conversation ensues:

Dad:  “So I go out the front door and I turn right to get to the car, right?”

Anne:  “No Dad, you go out the front door and turn left.  But you’re not driving anyway.  So look me in the eye and say, ‘I’m not driving anyway.’

Dad:  “I’m not driving anyway.”

Anne:  “Good.”

Dad:  “So I go out the front door and turn right to get to the car?  Right?”

I then proceed to tell him that I am taking the keys with me because I can’t trust him and he throws an absolute fit.

So I go to his condo on Friday morning to start packing for the move to assisted care (movers are coming wed.) and his answering machine is flashing. Two messages are there: One from Chase Automotive Financing and the other from our local Chase branch with this message from this eager kid banker:  “Hi Mr. C! This is Larry Novack!– from Chase!  I got an answer for you! sooner than I thought! Give me a call!”

I say to myself, “uh-oh.  what car loan?”  So I called Chase and found out he secured an auto loan for $30,000 so he can buy a replacement 2007 Mercedes C class (the same kind of car that he has that I now won’t let him drive.)  He called them behind my back from the nursing home on the lock-down dementia nut-job floor where you have to go through an operator to call out because the nutbaskets call 911 at 3 in the morning to tell 911 they’ve been kidnapped.   I call Chase and find out that his request for a loan (THAT MORNING) was approved in like 2 hours.  I start yelling at the guy.  I said, “For God’s sake.  My father is 86 1/2, has dementia and is in a nursing home.  And if you bothered to look at his accounts, you’d see he has almost NO FUCKING MONEY.  WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?!??!”  The guy goes, “well his credit score is great.  He has an 800.”

And we wonder why Wall Street collapsed?!

I’m trying to get my father into assisted care.  He spent 5 days in the hospital (may have had a stroke–his right side comes and goes and so does slurry speech).  Now he’s in rehab at a nursing home and I’m trying to move him into assisted care.  Initially he wouldn’t go to assisted care, but then after 10 days in the nursing home/rehab place, said he would go (because it’s so much better than the nursing home), but, as of yesterday, started vehemently refusing to go and saying he was going back to his condo.  I have picked out the apartment at Sunrise (Dad keeps calling it ‘Sunset’), have cashed stock (he’s spent almost everything he had), bought a bed, secured a moving company for this Wednesday, bought a flat screen tv for him, started packing shit etc. etc.

The last two mornings he has called me and told me “I’M NOT GOING TO THAT PLACE” about 100 times.  Really, a hundred times.  He’s hung up on me at least 4 times and is being totally impossible, as he is so prone to be.  I actually dropped the f bomb on him yesterday for the first time in my life:  “I got you a wonderful apartment in a really nice assisted care facility across from one of your two churches, one block from your girlfriend, 5 minutes from me and it costs six-fucking-thousand-dollars a month, and since you spent all your money you’ve now left me in a bind on how to pay for it and now you’re telling me that you won’t go?!??!”

Here’s a picture of my baby.  3 years old.  A back bred Golden Doodle named Hampton.  He is a proud member (as am I) of Canine Therapy Corps. in the Chicago area.  We work with autistic kids and adults; burn victims and troubled teens.  It’s so good for the soul!  Hampton and I get so much more out of our work than what we give.  It’s an amazing experience!

So Hampton and I had two great therapy dog sessions last night and this morning.  Last night we worked with the troubled teen boys teaching them how to work with the dog–how to make Hampton sit, stay, lie down, stay down until called etc.  The kids really respond so well to this teaching.  You can just see the change in them in an hour.  They feel like they’ve accomplished something positive and that they actually have control over something (the dog).  Great stuff!

Also, our work with the autistic children is just as rewarding.  Each Friday morning, Hampton and I go to an autistic school and work with children on the autism spectrum.  It’s is totally amazing to watch these children–some of whom can’t walk or speak, respond to this big white ball of fluff!  They love him!  And they love the other dogs who come to the center.  One is a gorgeous Golden Retriever named Billy.  The third is a darling beagle named Libby.  Good to have 3 different size dogs as the children relate differently to the different sizes.

Hey Everyone!   Circa 1856 is a huge backer of animal therapy groups.  If you have a dog with a gentle disposition, PLEASE consider looking into dog therapy.  I recently found the wonderful group, Canine Therapy Corp. (caninetherapycorps.org) here in Chicago.  I have a 3 year old golden doodle named Hampton who has become an absolutely fabulous therapy dog.!!!When he was younger, I got so many comments about him as soon as I left my house to take him for a walk in the city, that I finally decided that I HAD to find a way to give back to society by exposing people to my wonderful animal.  So, I looked into dog therapy.  I had had Hampton formally trained when he was 6-12 months and then I worked with him so that he could pass the Canine Therapy Corps test (it’s hard).  If you go to their website, you can see the video of the test.  Hampton passed on the first try (only about 15% do) and I was SO proud, I was crying!   We have subsequently worked with autistic children and young adults at two different autism centers here in the Chicago area.  We also have worked with burn victims and with troubled teenage boys in a foster home.  SUCH rewarding work!!!  It puts all of my petty problems in perspective.  I swear I get more out of the work than what I give.  Hampton is absolutely fabulous!!!!  Everyone loves him.  If you have a sweet puppy dog, I urge you to check out the dog therapy groups in your area!!!!

Taking all ideas and suggestions as I begin to create new pieces for the spring and summer line!  I’m about to embark on an antique store spending spree and would like to know if anyone has any requests for me to find certain things to be used in the making of my necklaces.  What are YOU interested in:  Masonic pieces?  Old medals and pins?  Victorian fobs?  Silver?  Gold? Metal?  Other? Let your imagination go wild and let me know!  I value your opinoins!

Third time in the last 5 months!!!  What’s up with that!?!??!  In the almost two years since I started my online Circa1856.com store, no credit card info has EVER been ripped off.  Maybe because my site is so secure?  Any ideas why my credit card info keeps getting nabbed!?!?!

I went to the post office the other day to pick up some new antique watch fobs that were being mailed to me by an antique store outside St. Louis. I also went to mail a package to my sister. I’m waiting in line FOREVER at one of the two open windows. The customer in front of me is mailing about 75,000 letters. Then, finally, it’s my turn. AND THE WOMAN LOOKS AT ME AND CLOSES THE WINDOW!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHH. Don’t you just HATE when that happens? Ok, so finally I get waited on, get the Circa 1856 packages and fill out the certified letter form for the package that I am mailing to my sister. The PO woman goes–”her address here. Yours there”–pointing to the boxes I was to fill in. I blindly fill the boxes in and pay the $25.73 to mail the package to Mary and then I leave. Fast forward to yesterday afternoon. Doorbell rings. It’s the mail man with a certified package and he needs my signature. I sign and look down at the package wondering what it is. It looks familiar. It looks familiar because IT’S SAME PACKAGE I MAILED TO MY SISTER. WHY? you ask. Because I mailed the GD thing to MYSELF!!! What a moron. So, now I’m out $25.73 AND have to go back to the Post Office, stand in line, pay $25.73 and mail the damn thing AGAIN!!!! Am I an idiot or what??!? At least I got some killer vintage pieces and have already fashioned some into new products. They’ll be on the Circa1856.com site soon.

Hey Everyone,Just wanted to let you know that there are lots of new necklaces on the Circa1856.com site. Check ‘em out and let me know what you think. Are there any requests out there for a certain kind of necklace or custom made pieces just for you or a loved one? Sign on and let me know. I love suggestions!   Thanks! Anne